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First off let me say that this blog is for you, the writer. IT'S NOT FOR MY READERS! That is what my STREET TEAM is for.
Lately I have come across some real issues, etiquette issues.
There is still a code of behavior that we writers have to use when it comes to other writers. Most newbie writers (which is most of my blogs target audience) are so excited that they just want to connect with other writers. Not only do they want to connect with other writers, they want to connect with other writers target audience. The problem is. . .writers forget the proper etiquette on how to go about doing this.
Do's and don'ts of asking a blog owner to guest blog and other social media rules:
* You need to comment frequently on the blog you want to guest blog on. Don't just show up as a phantom follower by sending an email telling the blogger that you LOVE the blog and would love to guest. The blogger knows that deep down you want something....to tap into their audience. BUT what have you done for them? You might have read their blog, but did you participate? I MEAN REALLY PARTICIPATE??
* After you send an email to the blogger to guest blog, give the blogger a few weeks to respond. Don't be persistent and don't re-send a follow up email. Wait a month until you do send that follow up email. If your blog tour is in a month....you didn't do your job. You need to have your blog tour scheduled TWO months in advanced.
If you don't hear from the blogger after two requests, then they are ignoring you! Stop emailing them.
* If you are lucky enough to get the guest spot that you so graciously requested, it's up to you to promote your guest post. DO NOT MAKE THE BLOGGER DO ALL THE WORK!!!!
When I have a guest blogger, I stalk their Facebook, Twitter, Goodreads, Triberr, every single form of social media to make sure they are promoting their spot on my blog. If they don't, I will never have them on again. This is RUDE! So it's up to you to promote your guest posts.
* Facebook! DO NOT MAKE A PAGE AND ADD OTHERS WITHOUT THEIR PERMISSION!! There is nothing more aggravating than getting on my Facebook and getting tons of feed from a group that I didn't join.
I have been debating about this one because it's getting worse by the day. This is also RUDE! What makes you think that just because someone is on Facebook, they want to be in some group? What gives you the right to put them in a group without asking them?
DO put a status up on your Facebook page that tells your group of friends that you are starting a new group, give a few deets about the group along with the link, and then let them decide.
DO post a nice little invite on your other groups that allow self promotion with a link. LET them decide if they want to join your group.
DO NOT POST A PROMO ON SOMEONE'S FACEBOOK PROFILE OR STREET TEAM unless you ask the owner of the page!! THIS BOILS my blood!!! And it's RUDE!!!
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I'm all about helping each other out, but not when I'm taken advantage of and the author thinks she/he has a right to do that because we are cyber friends. It's not only RUDE to me, but it's spamming my STREET TEAM.
On the other hand, if you message the person who owns the page and ask them if they can post on your page, that is a different story. When someone is polite enough to message me and ask me if they can post their book or their new page on my page, I generally agree. I don't let them post their promo stuff on my STREET TEAM, but I will on my personal page and author page.
All in all, use your common sense. Use your manners! OR you will be seen as a POACHER and SELFISH PROMOTER. Keep your image clean and email for the right answers, don't just ASSume that is't okay
Do you have any more etiquette tips to add?
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Tonya, in my exuberance I may have been guilty of this a while ago as I was promoting on all my pages - and you are so right - it is taking advantage of your readership!! I really apologize. You have always been gracious and are one of my mentors.
ReplyDeleteYour street team is genius and you deserve to reap the sole benefits!!
Respectfully,
~Nancy Jill
Nancy!! I'm not at all talking about you! OR anyone other authors on my STREET TEAM~It's just that I get sooooo many questions from other authors that ask about this poaching and I thought it would be a good thing to do a blog post on it. Plus the blogging thing. I think it's so rude that people ask to guest blog on blogs and don't expect to do the leg work to promote it. . . .sigh. . .
ReplyDeleteTonya, thanks for writing this post. I found the part about approaching a blogger about guest posting especially helpful.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Lisa! Every blogger has their own standards, but a general manners guide is always good!
DeleteGreat post Tonya. I always have my readers in the back of my mind. They're loyal and I'm loyal to them. If someone has a similar product I don't mind them sharing with my readers. I don't own them and I let them make up their minds. I have never had someone abuse it. I do hate having to take the time to ingore invites so that my notifications aren't full of things I'm not interested in. Thanks for a great post.
ReplyDeleteElizabeth Loraine
http://elizabethloraine.com/
Thanks for supporting this for me, Lorraine! It was definitely a hard post for me to write. Anyone who knows me, knows that I don't like to hurt anyone's feelings. But I've about had my fill with some rude people.
DeletePreach it, sister. Many months ago, someone showed up on my author page, totally out of the blue, and posted a link to their own book without asking me first. I was stupefied. Who in their right mind thinks that's okay?
ReplyDeleteOh, Melissa! I soooo agree. I wonder if it's my southern manners or the fact that my parents made me go to manners school when I was younger that rudeness sets me off....sigh.
DeleteI can only imagine how hard it was to write this, but sometimes you have to put your foot down! It's hard enough building a following to have someone take the easy rode and cut into your source. Poaching can be tempting, but it is important to remember that noone gets up and achieves success overnight! It is earned.
ReplyDeleteI think that it all boils down to good manners. I'm more likely to say sure then find out that someone posted something or begged me to read something.
DeleteIt does boil down to manners. Like you said, all they have to do is ask. The last time I checked the word 'no' never killed anyone.
DeleteOooohhh....posting promo on my timeline... That'll get the poster "unfriended" in a heartbeat.
ReplyDeleteI don't mind the occasional one, people get carried away with exuberance...but dayum. I've had authors practically take over and flood my page with "Buy my book" links.
I don't think I've *ever* posted something to someone else's page unless it was a question for them, or praise for a book I've read.
It does seem to become more commonplace to spam without even saying "Hi" and manners are definitely going out of the window.
IT's sad that they are going out the window. Manners is the ONE thing that really gets someone to like you.
DeleteHi Tonya!
ReplyDeleteThis was a great post - and timely, I think, since I've just noticed a few of my Facebook friends have posted notes this morning asking people to please not advertise on their timelines.
That is incredibly ... ballsy, pardon my French. My pet peeve has been people sending me their books to review without any notice or prior contact, but that seems small compared to this.
I have to wonder - does it ever work? Who would be tempted to click on that link? As a reader, I would be put off by the sheer rudeness.
Crazy! I understand enthusiasm, sure, but manners are manners!!
YES! I did blog about this bc I have been seeing a lot of people's stuff get spammed. We talked a lot about this at the retreat I was just at and I was the only fully self published author there.
DeleteWhat a great post and since I'm doing a guest post next month, I'm glad I read it.
ReplyDeleteI wish everyone on Facebook would read this. I hate being added to groups without being asked. I really can't stand it when someone posts their promo on my page without asking.
I just think that proper manners apply.
DeleteAND....when they don't use proper manners, it makes me NOT want to support them. I don't like feeling that way at all.
DeleteI am doing a workshop for a local RWA chapter on planning and executing a book blog tour. All of your points are there. But the one that really hacks me off? To host someone on my blog AND THEY DON'T SHOW UP TO TALK! RUDE RUDE RUDE! I've gotten to where I'm telling guests they have to commit to come that day or I'll pass on hosting them.
ReplyDeleteCynthia, that is GREAT! I didn't even think of that one. Very rude!
DeleteHi Tonya,
ReplyDeleteIn my excitement, I posted on your Street Team asking if anyone would be interested in joining my Street Team as well. I apologize if that was a no-no. I think you had said you wanted to be part of my team so I did add your name, but if you don't, please let me know and I will take your name off. I enjoy your blogs and often comment. I appreciate that you share all of your marketing expertise with all of us. Again, I deeply apologize if I did a bad thing. I sorry ... :(
As you know, Gerri, I was NOT talking about you or anyone on the STREET TEAM. I'm super excited to promote you and your amazing new Street Team.
DeleteI know you weren't. Thanks for your support in promoting me and my upcoming release. And thanks for writing the fabulous Tricked Out Toolbox, which gave me so many wonderful marketing ideas. <3
DeleteThis really must make you angry.
ReplyDeleteAnd yet I don't see a lot of professional writers getting this upset about people self-aggrandizing on their facebook walls. It's just part of what happens.
Sometimes you just delete what you don't want on there and then let it go. I hate to say it, but even though you're not wrong, this whole post sounds a little bitter. As a first-time reader, it makes me not want to read what else you have to say.
Hey "Coffee Mug" so glad to see you are new to blogger. That's fantastic that you are reading my posts. VERY happy to have you. And if you did follow my posts, you'd see this is the first time that I have posted something like this.
DeleteI'm not sure which "circle" of writers that you hang around with, but I just left a retreat with ONLY traditional published authors and as a matter of fact, all of my personal/in person writer friends are traditionally published and I'm the ONLY one fully self-published. AND it does happen to them MORE! This is one conversation that we had this past weekend and it sparked this blog.
Of course we all delete it and move on, that is what we have done over the past six years, as we do NEGATIVE people in our lives. But at some point it made GREAT sense to gently remind writers that there is etiquette that needs to be followed.
I appreciate your insightful comment. D
Great post. I do have mixed feelings about being added to groups. There are a handful that I found quite helpful sales wise. I still get an occasional email and I just ignore them unless they do it again. It's very annoying to have another writer post a link on your page, but so are those game links. I remove them and occasionally rant, sorry I'm human too. What bugs me is tagged photos. I'm still unaware of why everybody can email me without being my friend, but I can't email anyone else.
ReplyDeleteI could give you a tip about something that scream unprofessional. I hate when I go on a readers and writers group and there is drama. People ranting about something that changes on the group, ect. They make themselves look bad in the worse way. What if someone new was just added? How do you think they would think about you or your books? Would they feel unwelcomed, put off.
If you're a serious writer you should know appearances are everything and the whole world is watching, just saying.
That is a good one, Madison. I definitely do not belong to groups that have drama, nor people. I learned my lesson a few months ago with another writer. Drama is negative energy and I rid myself of that! MUCH better now.I'd probably have to dump those groups.
DeleteBefore anyone joins a group or stays in a group that they were put on, they need to check out the group rules. I find that really helpful on what I can and can not post.
I'm really bad at reading them. I don't do it on purpose and am much more careful now than I was, live and learn. Everything else you mentioned I figured out before I published my book.
ReplyDeleteThat's the way we learn:) Live and learn.
DeleteGreat post with great tips to help folks...if they will pay attention! Just tweeted it to my Buffer account!
ReplyDeleteAwesome! Thanks, Donna!!
DeleteHow true is this? Totally. I don't think I have been guilty, but I may have been in the early days.
ReplyDeleteIt didn't however, take me long to realise that there are some out there who have no scruples whatsoever.
I would like to post this on my FB page if I may.. because it boils my blood also. when consistent offenders spam my pages..
I can't tell you how many I have deleted, and how many groups I have left because of it..
Thanks Tonya...x
Absolutely you can post this! Anyone can post anything from my blog as long as you link back:) Good Karma! Thanks, Rosalind!
DeleteNice one, Tonya, and totally agree. I just quietly wipe posts off my facebook but it does hack me off. I think there can be a lot of overenthusiasm with new indie authors who don't always realise whose window they're shouting out of.
ReplyDeleteThanks for coming! Yes the best thing to do is quietly delete them.
DeleteThis was a good post, Tonya. I hope I have never been guilty on any of those posts. What I didn't know/remember was to make sure I promo a week before I'm to be on a blog. Duh. Thank you so much for reminding me. So glad I stopped to read your post. :)
ReplyDeleteThis post wasn't written for anyone here. It was written because of an interaction between me and a person who got extremely upset that I didn't have time to review his book and them poached my readers who don't read that genre. My readers were very upset.
DeleteI just thought it would be a good reminder for all of us.
I thought this was a terrific post, Tonya, New to blogging myself, its sometimes hard to know what is within the parameters of being courteous and what would be considered poaching. Right now, I'm still in the phase of making the occasional comment on blogs I like and feeling my way around. I always enjoy your posts!
ReplyDeleteGreat post! I think a lot of this happens because there's nothing really tangible there, so people don't realize how it comes across or appears (I'm having a really hard time explaining what I want to say. As Stephen King would say, I might be in the wrong profession! :-D)
ReplyDeleteIn real life, they wouldn't walk up to your house and plaster their things all over your walls for their friends to see, but they don't see it as the same on FB. They wouldn't just show up at a your barbeque and start inviting all of your friends to their house for a party, assuming if they're at your house and you're friends, then they'd surely want to come to your house for a party too. But in the virtual world, it's not viewed as being the same thing, when it should be.
Thanks for the reminder, and for saying what so many others have surely wanted to say, but haven't!
Oh I have gotten so much slack for this. People are wondering if its them, but it's not. Just a good reminder.
DeleteWonderful advice! I'm sharing and hoping that some will learn from this. I really really hate being added to groups without my permission. I also hate others posting their links on my wall. I'm a very generous person and I post tons of other people's stuff myself. If I want the post there I'll put it there. If I haven't, usually all it would take is a quick IM to ask me to post it. In most cases I probably would.
ReplyDeleteI would add one other thing: When you are a guest on another blogger's site, you should interact with those that comment. It's rude not to check back in periodically to see what's going on, comment, answer questions, etc.
Great tip! Thank you for your support!
DeleteI just recently ran across this blog and am delighted to see this post. I especially like the advice of NOT adding people to a group they didn't concent to be on. I get pulled into one group every other day. Annoying!!
ReplyDeleteWhen it's. My writer friends and their groups, I don't mind. Its the people I don't know that wears me out.
DeleteI see this happen so much - and I know it must drive people crazy! It definitely bears mentioning and repeating! Great post.
ReplyDeleteTasha
Couldn't agree more! Great post, as usual!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Sherry!
DeleteTonya, I like how you have managed to keep a delicate balance between helping other author's promote their work and hone the craft while keeping your own readers happy. Thanks for a great post! Traci
ReplyDeleteHelpful post, Tonya. You struck a chord. Look at all the comments! I'm sticking my little toe in the blog tour water, so this came right when I needed it. Thanks!
ReplyDeleteThank you for taking the time to share your frustration and provide a lesson on writer/blog etiquette. I'm still riding around with training wheels on, I’m in no position to offer wisdom to others just yet nor am I ready to pursue publishing. When I am ready to give it a go, I will remember what you’ve said here.
ReplyDeleteI really enjoy your posts on FB & Blog as well as your tweets. TY!
Hi Tonya
ReplyDeleteThis was refreshing to read. So I'm not the only skeptic out there? I'm new to blogging and really struggling with the whole guest post thing. Two people have asked me to interview them but i fancy keeping my blog as it is ... my own shorts, haikus and pics. Maybe this is wrong/ not the point? But i know the blogs i like to follow are similar ie the 'writing' ones and not all the incessant marketing tips -although some of these are of course are both useful and excellent!