I honestly can not believe my twins are heading off to college in a few months. Truth be told, I've been preparing myself for this moment for some months now. For Christmas I made sure I bought them things they will need like a new laptop, new bedding, etc., that they will need to take with them because it was decided by them that they would go away from home.
That said. . . they turned 18 years old back in September. They are good boys and I've never had to police them or their activities. The only real control I had was over their checking and savings accounts. All I heard was "I can't wait until I'm 18", "When I'm 18...". When they turned 18, I started to treat them like grownups. I didn't transfer money into their accounts, I didn't wake them for school, I didn't take them to their dr appointments, I didn't do their laundry, I didn't pay for special nights out with friends and I didn't make their lunches for school. It was a big eye opener for them.
Now it's taken them FIVE months to say to me "yeah, I don't like being 18." Hahhaa!! They want to be treated as a grownup without the responsibilities. Not only that but guess who's name is back on their savings and checking account?! MINE!
I'm glad I gave them a good dose of what reality as an adult is really like because now they know they have to work extra hard for the education that they are paying for.
And so it goes. . .One has decided to stay home and go to college and live here. The other is still going away. It looks like I'm not going to be an empty-nester anytime soon.
Tell me about an experience you had with life lessons in the comments and I'll pick a winner for a Tonya Kappes Krew mini tote!
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ReplyDeleteI was in my second semester of law school and had complete knee reconstruction. I was determined to stay in school. The reality hit me the first day I returned to class there was no way I could do this on my own. I spoke to the dean and got took the semester off returning in the summer. I did finish, but it was a huge wake up call.
ReplyDeleteGood for you Sarah!! What an inspiring story!! Thanks for sharing!
DeleteMy experience with life lessons has been a very hard one. I had a beautiful little girl who was diagnosed with a brain tumor at age 8 and passed at age 10. I thought these things only happened to other people, but I sure was wrong. I learned that life continues and you have to get strong to continue on. She was my only child and would be 28 now, wow I could be a grandma. It has been a bitter hard lesson but somehow I have continued. I treasure the people in my life and am a much more compassionate person for people now. I am grateful that it did not make me a bitter person.
ReplyDeleteOh Darlene. I'm so sorry. It's tough. Something similar with my aunt/uncle with two children. I know the pain never goes away. I will keep you in my prayers always!
DeleteIt never does, but I have learned that laughter and reading have helped me. Thanks for the prayers and the great books you write :)
DeleteI'd say my hardest life lesson was becoming a widow at 32 and having teenage children at home . I worked 2 jobs neither one easy. 1. A floor sander refinished , the other working on cars. My children are all in their 40's well educated. It was one of the hardest part of my life , but by the grace of God I made it.
ReplyDeleteI'd say my hardest life lesson was becoming a widow at 32 and having teenage children at home . I worked 2 jobs neither one easy. 1. A floor sander refinished , the other working on cars. My children are all in their 40's well educated. It was one of the hardest part of my life , but by the grace of God I made it.
ReplyDeleteYOU are amazing! I've worked three jobs before and it's tough. Before I started writing full time, I was working two jobs and a single mom. I bet you are so proud of your children!!! Yes, God has amazing grace!
DeleteWhen I was in high school (ages ago), I had a part-time job. As a result, my parents had me help pay for my own school clothes, buy my own books, pay for my own lunches, and help with minor household expenses. I learned the value of money very quickly what it took to survive in the world. I tried to teach my children the same things (although not to that degree).
ReplyDeleteOh! We do this with our children. In order for them to have a car, they have to pay for their own gas. I'm not hauling all their friends around. They quickly learned the value of their OWN dollar when they had to use their own money.
DeleteMy husband and I were blessed with two children within 17 months of each other. When our daughter who is the oldest decided she wanted to check out colleges, we went on a visit to the one she had her heart sent on going to. Although it was only about 4 hours away, she realized the meaning of going away to college and sorry to say so did I. Needless to say she changed her mind and attended our local college. I realize how empty our house would be without her if she had gone away but know the time will come.
ReplyDeleteOh Robin. I completely get this!
DeleteMOM KNOWS BEST!! Decades ago...I stayed home and attended the local JC knowing it was less expense for my parents and a wearing process for me. For my final years toward a degree teacher credential, I went about an hour away. My dad helped me get a job for spending money expecting me to come home often for visits. Although being responsible for myself resulted in a horrific grade point average in my first semester away, I did get it together on my own...successfully!
ReplyDeletekat8762@aol.com
Whoohooo!! Good to hear!
DeleteHardest life lesson so far would have to be saying goodbye to my mom. She was o my 47 and I 22. She never got to see or hold her grandchildren. I never got to ask her advice about my kids, never got to enjoy seeing her enjoy them. I miss her laugh and just spending time with her. After 15 years it still seems like yesterday some days. But I know she is in a better place.
ReplyDeleteAwe, Anna. I'm so sorry. That is tough.
DeleteHardest life lesson so far would have to be saying goodbye to my mom. She was o my 47 and I 22. She never got to see or hold her grandchildren. I never got to ask her advice about my kids, never got to enjoy seeing her enjoy them. I miss her laugh and just spending time with her. After 15 years it still seems like yesterday some days. But I know she is in a better place.
ReplyDeleteI think my hardest life lesson was when I was going thru my divorce. I was just laid off from my job and he decided to leave. When things seemed to be so bleak,I found out how strong I was and that I was so much better off without him.
ReplyDeleteRIGHT!!! I completely understand since I too went through a divorce. Hugs!
DeleteMe and my husband married young. We always had someone (his mom) to help us with money and stuff. We waited to have kids for about five years and was doing good. When my daughter was three we started having troubles. We had to move to another state to keep husbands job. Lost our house. And a mountain of other stuff. What happened when we moved? We grew up. Big time. We was 8 hours away from anybody we knew. I had to put my accounting/budgeting classes to use. But now 10 years later and two kids we are back home and can do it ourselfs now. It's nice to have grandma for just a once in awhile babysitter.
ReplyDeleteOh! Good but hard life lesson!!!
Deleteone life lesson was when a person i trusted stole money from me while i was severely ill & recovering from a major surgery. it took me many years, court proceedings, wage garnishments, bank garnishments, changes in lawyers, but i finally am getting it repaid to me plus interest. i learned even though it is embarrassing a bit that all this happened, to never give up on something. it might take awhile, but it will happen.
ReplyDeleteOMG! NOVA!!!Good on you for sticking with this! Most people wouldn't have.
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